Friday, July 8, 2011

Emotions

Why do I have so many? Why do I express them so much? Why do I wear my feelings on my sleeve?

But seriously. My emotions depend SO much on the people around me. Why? I don’t know.

If people around me are angry, upset, sad, I find it really hard not to be like that, but I don’t realize I’m doing it always. I’m partially terrified of making the situation worse. I don’t want to say something that will make the person more angry, upset, or sad.

I’m not selfish with my emotions. Interpret that how you want.

It’s hard for me to have the mindset that I’m out for my own good. I care a lot about the feelings of those around me.

I don’t like being told that what I have is “crap”. I don’t like being told my car is old and not perfect, I know that, but you saying it belittles me. I don’t like you saying that my iPhone sucks, because I’m proud of it, I like it, and it works AWESOME for me, which is all that matters. I hate people saying anything about my family. No family is perfect, but I love them and you have no right judging the few people that know me best. Please don’t make fun of my clothes. I don’t WANT to look like everyone else so when I step out of my comfort zone and try something new, don’t tell me it’s ugly or weird. I’m self conscious enough without someone laughing at my pink shoes. Jealous you can’t pull it off or what?

This post comes with some animosity and I apologize. It’s been a rough week.

So, I’m one of those people that can’t drive with people in the car. I can listen to the radio, I’ve changed clothes while driving before, I have eaten while driving, and numerous other things, but having people in my car is the worst distraction ever. I can’t parallel park with someone in the car, I can barely drive down the street straight. I don’t know why. No idea, but as of lately, I hate it.

Ugh, I’m just ready for this week to be over. Fourth of July kind of messed it up. The long weekend really didn’t make the week seem shorter.

This week at work was less productive than I would have liked. But that’s my own standard. I got done what I needed, but it was more or less busy work, which doesn’t show immediate results. Still exciting, and I still love my job a lot.

My hair is getting so long and annoying. But I think I have a fear of hair cuts. No idea why or where it came from, but I always find every reason to avoid getting it cut. Ugh….

#nowplaying- #Symphonies #DanBlack

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