Saturday, May 7, 2011

You Always Want What you Can't Have

(Can some English major tell me what in that title should be capitalized 'cause it's bothering me?)

So, I do a lot of complaining, which is horrible, because I have so much in my life to be thankful for. I don't know where to begin, yet I do.
My family. Mom, dad, Isaiah, hopefully you'll all be proud to read this but I mean it with all sincerity, even as the baby devil child I can be. My brother and I ask each other all the time how our parents did such a good job raising us. Even with my dad being a pastor, I wasn't pounded into a strict religious cult or crazy rules. My parents didn't let me run the streets or not look out for me. I had a mere 10:00 curfew all through high school that kept me out of trouble and taught me many lessons. I ate family dinner and watched the news at 5:30 almost religiously for the first 18 years of my life. I couldn't be more thankful for that. I was given enough to be spoiled but not so much I was self-centered or ungrateful. Point is; my family is pretty awesome.
Next, I must talk about my friends. I've had quite a few people in my life who have been horrible friends for numerous reasons. I don't blame them or I, because everyone is different and you can't please everyone, I think that is totally okay. But on the other hand, I've had friends in my life mean the world to me. A good friend is irreplaceable. They know you, your secrets, your flaws, your personality, attitude, story, and still like you. I recently said to my best friend; "I'm glad that we can complain and be upset together rather than complain and argue to each other." There's a big difference. Anyways, I'm thankful for the friends that know and accept me because I've had a lot of people not accept me and it hurts. Those people have only made me stronger and more able to stick up for myself, so thanks to you too.
I'm thankful for my "thinggggs", as my dad would say. Yeah, they're only things, many of them can be replaced, but I'm so blessed to have it all. Clothes, jewelry, electronics, food, furniture. Everything, more than I need.
I'm thankful for school and 2 jobs. I am being educated. I wish I knew the statistics for what percentile I fall in for being educated compared to the world. I'm positive I'm in the top half maybe even forth or higher. I'm so thankful for the opportunity many people don't have. Having 2 jobs is also better than most. I know they are only service industry jobs, but I don't care. It's money and I work for it. I'm thankful for employers who see me as a good worker. Thank you.
I'm thankful to have a license and a car. (Not so much gas prices right now.)
I'm thankful for my genes. Mom, dad--you are beautiful people, but I don't know how you had such a beautiful daughter. (Wow, I sound lame and conceded, but that's not what I mean.) You deserve it more than me. The amount of times I get compliments are sometimes overwhelming, but I try not to let it influence my behavior. I'm not into myself and I don't think I'm "hott", probably not even as confident as I should be, honestly. BUT, the attention is nice, deep down, and I'm glad God has blessed me.
I could make a list of everything, but it would really be quite long and I've talked about the top things so far.
These are the things that put the smile on my face. That makes it so that I get compliments on my pearly whites.
Don't think I have forgotten about the thing I am most thankful for. The person I cannot see, yet still believe. The person who has given me all I have to be thankful for. The guy that helps me make decisions and keeps me safe. God. He's totally the reason our family is blessed in so many ways. Go ahead and judge me, that's not important to me.
It feels good to express my thankfulness, I don't do it enough and don't want to sound like I'm bragging.

<3 Much love <3

Rom 8:28: And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose

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