Monday, December 14, 2009

Vinegar and Sea Salt

Hola friends!

This past week has been a good one for many of the people around me. My roommate, C C, was offered a summer internship at General Mills, which she is VERY excited for. She is planning on living in Milwaukee for the summer so that's when we will be getting a place, so most likely, I will be here for the summer as well, provided I find a job, please pray for me!
My brother defended his thesis today, which is a big step also. I'm not sure exactly what that means but I think he waits now to see if he is actually done. So, congrats on some relief, I think! (I'm sure he did good.)

My mom sent out our family Christmas letters and I just got it today, so I'm proud she got them out before christmas! ....Another exciting year at the Janzen house.

I have my first quiz in Statics on Thursday. I hope I do good. I'm feeling solid in the class right now, I have an awesome professor, so we will see.

Oh yeah....I was denied giving blood AGAIN this past week. I think I've tried about 7 times and only been able to do it once because my iron level is always too low. I'm starting to figure out why. Although I take vitamins and eat high iron foods the day before attempting to give blood, I drink A LOT of caffeine, which eats up iron like none other I've found out. It's a horrible habit, I wish I had self-control to stop, but I'm addicted to coffee and soda. Maybe that should be my new years relsolution!!

Alright, well I'm off to my last class for the day, then to the gym, and mucho homework tonight.

4 days til christmas break!!

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Predicting the Unexpected

So it is 32 degrees out and we have maybe an inch of snow. This is far from the teen temperatures and foot of snow that was expected. I'm not sad that it isn't freezing, I'm not sad we don't have a foot of snow, I'm sad I prepared myself for something that isn't going to happen. I hate being let down, and I try not to let other people down.

Although the weather people have pretty accurate ways of predicting the weather and can get close to what will actually happen, weather can be VERY unpredictable. On this side of town, it's barely snowing, on the other side of Milwaukee it's blizzarding. An hour north and an hour west of milwaukee, they have 1/2 a foot of snow. So unless I have my own personal weather forecaster that can tell me what the weather would be like on my street, I might always be let down by the forecast...

For good news, I only have one class tomorrow, so I'm not at all dissapointed we won't be having a snow day because I basically have one anyways.

I did a good job studying tonight. I have a hard time studying sometimes. Too many distractions or no motivation, or I convince myself I can't do it. I sat down with my "tutor" and got a lot done. It felt good to see accomplishment, it's good to have nights like these because I sleep better. Not worrying I forgot to do something because I didn't do much...

Well that's all I've got for tonight. Goodnight

Tuesday, December 8, 2009


If you have time to watch this video, please do! It is very interesting!!

Monday, December 7, 2009


Hi all,

Once again, it's been a while since the last time you've heard from me. I'm starting the second week of my second trimester. (Side note: the college I'm attending has 3 semesters per year, not 2, so they are called trimesters.) First week went pretty well. I have a good schedule and my classes are falling in to place and gaining speed...I am taking IE203 which is Applications of Statistics in Industrial Engineering, ME205- Statics, not to be confused with Statistics, Calc 3, and HU4200 which is Linguistics. Language fascinates me, so the class is pretty interesting. Although Statics class scares me a lot, I think I have a pretty cool professor. He was corporate Vice President at the company Generac for many years and is now retired and "giving back" as a professor at MSOE. I have 31 people in my class and I think 26 are taking it for their second time. As one of the 5 people taking it for my first time, I am a little scared!

For other news, there is a blood drive on campus tomorrow, I'm going to try donating for my 9th time?...I've only been able to do it once. I always have low iron levels. I'm eating peanut butter right now actually.

It is snowing a little bit right now, but it's not sticking. We are supposed to have a big snow storm tomorrow night or something. I think I'll believe it when i see it though. Snow is always nice for a week or two but it would be nicer if it took a week or two to melt. Or if we could have snow when it was 80 degrees out, that would be sweet :)

Saturday, November 21, 2009

My Jaw hurts

Temporomandibular Joint Syndrome.

It's what I have.

I'm sure you've heard about it, but don't really know what it is. In basic terms, my jaw is displaced and causes a clicking sound. Sure, it is more complicated than that, but I do not even fully understand it. I know that I grind my teeth at night. Grinding your teeth is like applying 250 pounds of force per square inch. Since your teeth are very strong bones, you can imagine the amount of force this is. And it isn't good at all for your jaw, muscles, bones, etc. So step 1; I have a retainer I wear at night. It is just a piece of plastic I grind into instead of grinding my teeth together, it greatly reduced the force. Whatever the case my jaw really hurts today.

Anyways, I am actually done with my first semester of sophomore year. I had finals this past week. It feels good to relax :) I miss my college friends though. There isn't anything to do at home anymore...

Well stay posted, since I'm not in school right now I'll have more time to write.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

If it were easy, everyone would do it.

I've REALLY REALLY been thinking about things lately.
Like how scary it is growing up. WOW.

Don't get me wrong, it's so fun and I'm savoring every moment 'cause I know I'll want it back when I don't have it, but it's a hard time.

In grade school/ middle school, it's all about having friends, having fun, living for the next day, coloring in school, reccess, you know. High school is all about drama, friends, fun, school, drama, thinking you're growing up, being rebelious, you know. And I'm still figuring college out.
You don't have as many friends, because you're not forced to know everyone you go to school with. I've seen some of the same ppl every week for over a year now and I still don't know their names. I don't have 20 different best girl friends to call to go with me to the mall. There is no more being rebelious in college. I mean who would you be rebelling against? Your parents are tens, hundreds, thousands of miles away and the security guard isn't going to yell at you when you walk in at 3a.m. The police have shootings and armed robberies to worry about, they aren't looking for 16 years olds out past curfew. (And you aren't 16 anymore anyways.) Your teachers don't care if you're asleep in class because they still get paid for you to sleep and you're just paying to sleep. Those kids won't last anyways. The nights of never bringing homework home or studying for a test the next day are no more. If you don't study, once again, you're wasting your own money. You watch what you wear because you don't have the money to waste doing laudry every week. You get fat because you can't eat decent food in a dorm room and even if you could, you don't have time. Okay so when you get done with college, you get a job, a family, a dog, a house. And there's not much I can say about it, because I haven't been there yet, but my parents seem pretty happy.

I'm really not always a depressed person. I just write depressing things in my blog a lot because it helps me get them out and talk about them so I can be a happy person.
I think I'm just going through a time of figuring myself out. Figuring out what makes me happy, who makes me happy, how to make my own decisions, learning from my decisions. It's just a time of growth and doing things on your own. Building the adult you will soon be. Getting over being scared of the dark or seeing the consequences of spending money on things you want and need.

Sorry if it ever gets redundant hearing about my problems growing up. They're really not problems, just things most kids my age don't think about or tell anyone and I'm an open person. I think telling your feelings is better in the long run. Because we all know I have a TON of feelings ;), ask my family about that one.

So I have my first final tomorrow, back to studying, just needed a break :)

PS i want to hike a mountain.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

It is a small world, BUT....

You wouldn't believe the number of times I've met someone who has connections to other people I've met. Or my family. I guess it makes it a lot easier to happen to me and my family because we have lived so many places, we have connections like no other. I can't remember how many times one of us has met someone that was from our hometown or went to school at the same place or knows one of our close high school friends or something or another. I'm waiting to meet someone from Kansas that knows where Sabetha is. That might just make my month. But anyways, even though we often refer to it as being a "small world" the truth is, its NOT!

So I've been thinking quite intensly lately where I want to live. This might be the hardest decision of my life, because I'd be happy living anywhere. Relatively speaking. I ask myself all the time if I'm a city girl or country girl, and I don't think I'm either, but I'm both. I love living in the city, keeping up on the latest fashions, seeing a skyline, always being around people, always having something to do. I love living in the country. I LOVE seeing the stars at night in a black sky, I love the security and safeness, not caring about fashion, and making things to do instead of paying for them. So where does this leave me? Would I be the type to live in a suburb? Maybe. But then I don't get the country and I don't get the city.

Next dilema, what location would I choose? Honestly, this leaves me the most confused. New York is too busy, Boston is beautiful, Flordia is too sticky, Texas is a little too far south, there's not much in Wyoming or South Dakota, California is high class, Wisconsin is cold, Kansas is flat. I love traveling. You learn so much about everything.

I think I'm just a person that is bad at making decisions. I say this because I find the best in everything. The places I've lived, the jobs I've had, the people I've met. Don't get me wrong, I complain more than I should and I deffinately don't like things, but some things you have to deal with. And why be an unhappy person when you could just make the best and be happy. Laughing adds time on your life, I'm fully convinced.

So until I graduate, I might ask myself every day where I belong or where God wants me, but I'll end up where I need to be and where I'm suppsoed to be and I'll make the best of it.

Keep me in your prayers, it helps :)

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Week 10 :-O

Last week before finals...CRAZY. Time sure flys when you're I don't know what I'd do if God hadn't rested on the 7th day. Would we have a 6 day week? No break? Well, we may never know, but I don't know how I'd get through this school without a rest or time to get some quality work done. Anyways, I'll be home 12 days to take a nice rest and see family. Much needed.

On to other news....
I ran a 5k this morning. I know, not a big deal, anyone can go run a 5k, right? (Well, not really) But it's not like I ran a marathon...But I'm proud of myself. I think that counts the most. I think the last time I ran a race was my freshman year in high school when I was on the cross-country team. I forgot how fun it was. I love the people that stand on the side and cheer you on. Random people that look you in the eye as you're running and just cheer for you. Or the crazy coaches that are yelling at someone specific to keep their eyes up, or shoulders back, or to push on. It's a fun rush. I'm not in great shape, running makes me tired, etc, BUT it's an awesome time to think while doing something productive and keep in shape. Well, I'm done with my ranting about running. Because I'm quite an amatuer, compared to oh say my brother....who considers a 5k to be a sprint...

Anyhew, this week should be pretty easy. Just finishing up projects I've been working on in a few classes. I say that like it's easy...but compared to my other work this semester.....PIE.

Love ya

Friday, November 6, 2009

Oh sweet....winter?

Im running a 5k this weekend! To be specific, the Jingle Bell Run/Walk at the zoo this Sunday for arthritis. I'm pretty excited because I've been running since school started so about 9 weeks. That's the highlight of my weekend.

As for other news, our semester ends next week basically. Monday is the start of our final week before finals. It feels like just last week I was making money, working outside....

Other than that I'm pretty excited to go home for thanksgiving..then christmas. Although it doesn't feel the same anymore, I'm just excited to take a break. Going home to my room has gotten kind of weird. I don't have anything there anymore. My life exists in just a little dorm room. Everything at home is just memories of high school. It's weird thinking I'll never really live at home again. Maybe for a summer, or on breaks, but if I decide to live in Milwaukee this year, I might never be going back. It's hard to realize because I remember when it hit me that I would never be living with my brother again. Our time growing up was so short and I remember thinking it couldn't take any longer for me to grow up! HA!

Well I have one last class for the week in 20 min so I'm gonna get going. Haven't chatted in a while, thought it was time.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

What I have and haven't learned in COLLEGE

I've learned that x doesn't JUST mark the spot. That when I hear y=, I picture my graphing calculator. I've almost learned greek because for some reason we use their letters allllll the time. I have it mastered how long it takes me from leaving my room to arriving at the 3rd floor in the library. I've learned so many peoples faces, yet barely any names. I've learned I have a fear of talking to professors. And although I may not be as smart as the rest of my classmates, I have the determination that none of them do.

I haven't passed all my classes and I certainly haven't passed every test, but I've learned that isn't the most important thing about going to college. I don't think tests can truely show your knowledge. Why? I'm a horrible test taker. But I get great grades on homework and most quizes. But that's a whole different story.

So besides what I learn in class, I've already learned many important life leasons. (Mom and dad, please don't be too flattered, the following is the truth and the world needs to know.) I've learned a lot about why my parents did what they did while I was growing up. (Even if they still don't know what they did.) I'm not a crazy partier/druggie like many of my friends and classmates, because I wasn't caged in while I was growing up, but I was also not allowed to do whatever I wanted. I was never pushed to be pretty, wear the nicest clothes, whatever. I wasn't pushed to play sports, etc. I made my own decisions, although my parents helped me see the future or what was morally/ethically right, of course. I've learned how important weekends are. I work so hard during the week that a couple days is really nice to be able to just "chill". I've learned A TON about friends. WOW. I feel like my high school relationships meant nothing for the amount of drama they caused me. I don't talk to anyone anymore really. I feel like I try but when I don't get the same in return, I just don't mean enough to them. I learned I hate when people tell me something and DON'T DO IT. I would rather be surprised than dissapointed. I've learned I HATE WINTER. Sorry, I know this offends many of my friends.

I have an unexpected problem though. Growing up, I was always portrayed as outgoing, friendly, open, talkative, etc, but I don't think that's completely true. With my close friends I certainly am all those things, but I think I've changed as I've grown up. I have a really hard time talking to new people. Specifically adults, bosses, generally people older than me. It's hard for me to talk to professors. I have no idea why. I want to, but I feel like my questions are stupid or that I'm a lost cause or that I'll get frustrated and not get my questions answered, I'm not sure. I'm scared of asking for job applications. I've kind of gotten over it because I really need/want a job right now, but getting up the nerve scares me. These are all weird things I've learned about myself because I LOVE attention. I loved dancing for the fact of being in front of TONS of people that were watching me. I loved acting because people were watching, ME. I love wearing new styles of clothes because people look at me. But it scares me to talk to older people. It's a work in progress.

Whew, that was an intense topic.....

Monday, October 5, 2009

Money Money Money

NO DOUBT does God have ways of showing you things.

Something to know before I tell you the story: I have a wristlet that holds my MSOE ID, my license, my debit card, my discover card, and a few other business cards I sometimes use. Now that you know that I can begin. So on Saturday I went to a party with some friends, and it was probably one of the craziest parties I've been to. Well, in taking off my jacket, I must have knocked off my wristlet. Minutes later, I realize I'm missing it. I go back to where it must have fallen off and ask everyone around if they saw it or to look for it. Well, happens that some girl picked it up and gave it to me. I look in it to see if anything is missing and sure enough, my $14 cash that I had was now gone. I was even going to offer the girl a couple bucks for finding it. I was so thankful, that at such a large party, someone would return it to me, unfortunately after they jacked my money. Fast forward a day, I go to the store with my roommate. As I was going through the self-checkout, I got $20 cash back. Well it was until I got home that I realized I didn't grab my $20. I immediately called pick n' save to which they took my name and number and told me to bring in my reciept and the money was mine. I was once again so thankful that they would trust it was mine. Fast forward yet another day, today. I get done with class and am walking back to my room and realize I don't have my wristlet. I figured it was in my room because I left in a hurry, and I've done that before. Well I get back to my room and scavenge all over to find NO WRISTLET. I run back to the classroom to see if I had left it sitting, but there was already another class that I didn't want to interrupt. I waited until it was over and went in the room to look, but NO WRISTLET. Thankfully, I had no money in it today, only my credit cards which I cancelled right away. How do all 3 of these things happen to me within a matter of a weekend? I can't deny I'm being sent a message. I have been spending a lot of money lately. I guess now that I have no money, I can't spend any. Just a very frustrating way to end my Monday. As if I wasn't stressed enough.
So all I ask is that you pray for 1) me-that I take better care of my finances and personal belongings and 2) for the person that has my wristlet that they find it in their heart to return it, ASAP.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Back up and Running

Enough complaining about gaining weight, I'm back in the gym. I ran a couple miles today. Nothing huge, but I was on the tredmil for about 20 minutes. It's encouraging to be in the gym. You see the guys that are there every day twice a day, with the huge pipes and six pack that can be seen through their cut-off tees, which is nice to know it is possible to get in shape by working out. Then you seen the over-weight people doing less strenuous things and at least for me, it's nice to know that they are trying to change.
I kinda had a break down last night, which was long coming. I've been gaining weight since freshman year of high school. Not a rediculous amount, I mean I take care of myself, but you know there's a point where you stop feeling good even if the world says your weight is fine. That's kinda where I am. And I complain about it which is hypocritical, because I get mad at people that say they're fat and don't do anything about it. So, end of story I went to the gym today. It was nice.

Um, no major plans, I've got some options. I think I'm going to finish watching The Office with my roomies then take a nap, because I can. :)

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Dark Blue

I have so many favorite songs and artists. It changes by the mood I'm in. When I'm calm I loveee listening to Jacks Mannequin. Just easy listening, up-beat rythm, over-all happy music. If I'm in a more rock mood, I'm totally turning on Jimmy Eat World, Weezer, All-American Rejects. Those are my favorites lately. I've also been listening to Taylor Swift recently. She has good break-up songs that are kinda pop/country and since she's a girl it's easier to relate to. That's another thing with the music I listen to, I alwayssss relate my life to the song. Family, friends, school, relationships, I always think of how the song is somehow true for me. Now, I also listen to popular songs on the radio, good up-beat songs, but they're not my favorite. I listen to them if I'm not in the mood for anything particular. I like hip-hop/ rap mostly just on the weekends. It gets me pumped up and, of course, good dancing music. :)

The title of this is Dark Blue, a song by Jack's Mannequin, I'm listening to them right now. I choose that song though, because the past few days have been cloudy and such and it was just an all around good song for the time. Someday when I move to a warm place, I'm going to crank the stereo listening to Jack's Mannequin the whole way.

"Slow down.. this night's a perfect shade of Dark blue"

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Carmel Apples

Packers lost today.
I did lots of homework.
The sun never came out.
I just bought a carmel apple.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Bad day

No reason really, or no ONE reason. Just one of those days you're dreding, and just the fact that you're dreding it, it doesn't go well. My wrist has hurting from the time I opened my eyes today. Is it in my head? Quite possible. Is it my way of taking the pain away from other aspects in my life? Quite possible. I handed homework in today for calc that I just wasn't confident about. I had a quiz in Physics, but my batteries died on my calculator. Which shows how truely reliant our generation is on calculators, although I think the problems have gotten harder. I had 4 hours of physics tonight and had to painfully listen to jazz in the park, knowing people were having more fun there and I was sitting in Physics...
I took off my rings today. Although the tan lines remind me of what's missing. :( Enough said.

Oh yea, my retainer broke in half this morning. I wear a splint for my jaw problem (tmj), and every morning I get out of bed and head straight to the shower. I took out my splint this morning still half asleep and dropped it. It's made of acrylic and when it hit the floor split into 2 pieces. Hopefully it's fixable...
As my dad put it: "No surprise, that's the way things are going right now."

Well, I have an orthopedic appointment early tomorrow morning and homework that needs to be done now. So hopefully I'll be in a better mood next time we chat.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Add it to the list.

I dred getting old for the simple fact that I'm only 19 and already have fragile bones. At 11 years old, I broke my first bone. My middle finger on my left hand. This happened when I was jumping on a trampoline with a guy that was quite larger than me and he landed on my hand and turned out I broke my finger and had a cast. Then when I was about 12 or 13 I broke my right arm in multiple places from doing a back hand spring in my basement. It doesn't end there. When I was about 15 I tore my MCL from downhill skiing and had a knee brace for quite a few months. When I was about 16 I injured my back in dance and had an MRI but they didn't find anything. It still occasionally hurts so I'm convinced there's something wrong with it, but not as bad as it could be. I am now 19 and I broke my wrist 2 days ago. I was raised with parents that looked out for me very well and made sure when I rode my bike I always wore my helmet and likewise when I went rollerblading, I didn't leave without my wristgaurds. Well, a couple days ago I go rollerblading with my friend who is not as experienced with rollerblading, so I gave her my wrist gaurds.....of COURSE, the time I'm not being careful, I fall flat on my back. My wrist was a little sore right away but I figured that pain was temporary. Well hours later when I couldn't even pull up my pants, I knew something was wrong. I went to the doctor yesterday and they did x-rays and the such to find I did indeed break my wrist. It's a buckle fracture so the doctor gave me a removable splint because it should heal faster than a normal break. Just thought I'd give you my life history of injuries.

Well I have some homework I need to do before "the game" tonight. (Packers vs. Bears) Apparently it's a big deal to everyone up here in the frozen tundra....ha.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Religion, God, Christ

Does it freak you out? Do you hate talking about it? Do you know what you believe? Do you believe?
I think in the past two years, I've become SO much more aware of my faith. I don't know everything about the bible, or even close for that matter, but I think I know enough to stand for what I believe. I guess being a pastors' kid, I was always made fun of for being a good little church girl, or having people tell me it sucks I have to go to church every Sunday, or that I was wasting my summers at church camp or on youth retreats, and to be honest it really got under my skin. I thought I could hide it but I guess I've learned in the past couple years that that's not who I am. Religion means a lot to me and my family. It hurts me to hear people brag about not going to church in months or since last Christmas. Am I going to force them to go to church? No, but I also don't need to hear them brag about not going. I guess I've come to see the morals of people who don't see faith the way I do and those morals aren't the same as mine. It's not like I'm going to push my view on anyone or make my friends believe what I do, or not be friends with people that don't believe the same, but it's hard to see their view.
Last night I sat in my bed reading the bible for about an hour. It felt really good and I went to church this week with a fellow pk (pastors' kid).

Today was my first day of classes. It went generally well. I don't have homework so I might start writing for my brother.
I might talk about politics tomorrow if you're lucky.

Back to school

So I start classes tomorrow. Am I excited? A little. After 13 years of first days of school, you'd think I'd be a pro, but every years the same, relatively speaking. Soon enough I will be back in the swing of things praying for the weekend to come a little sooner.

On to other news, I've been asked to co-write a book with my brother. Am I excited? Of course. I've always loved journaling and telling people my thoughts and opinions because so often I listen to others. But writing is always good. You learn so much about yourself and how you feel without the slightest influence of others. It's a good feeling. But anyways, I won't leak the topic quite yet but I need to start thinking what I'll write. Start brainstorming.

It's kind of a topic that I can't be bias about because the entire book would be opinion and people that didn't agree with me would likely be angry and not want to read it. On the other hand, I have to be able to tell my point of view because that is part of the book too. I guess it's complicated to talk about yet at this stage. I'll keep updating as I understand more I guess.

On that note, I need to prepare for school tomorrow, I have a lot to learn.
Goodnight world.

Monday, August 31, 2009


So, I'm not the most fun blogger to follow as you can see, I write very seldom. I think it's because I have so much I want to say that I don't know where to start or if anyone wants to hear.
I'll start by saying my boyfriend and I broke up after almost 2 years. Please don't ask me why. Things happen and people grow apart. Sure it's weird re-admitting myself to the "single life" but it's important I know who I am and stand for that so I don't have to worry about not knowing who I am. Make sense? It's a little confusing.

I move back to school in 2 days so the stress of gathering my life up again is hitting about now. I couldn't imagine having divorced parents and living in two different places because having a dorm room and a room at my parents house was too much for me. Having 2 sets of everything, things I like better at one place, etc etc. On the other hand, I'm very excited to be living with my roommates whom are great friends from last year. Should make things MUCH better.

My summer job came to an end last Friday. As with any job I'm given, I made the most of it and learned A LOT! I made some great friends that I will miss so much and hopefully stay in contact with. I learned how to be an amatuer bartender and a great waitress (or so I think). I met a lot of interesting people and learned more about cars then I even cared to hear. All in all my job this summer was great, I can't complain...too much.

Speaking of summer I'll tell about the rest of it. I've had some crazy nights with some crazy friends and love the freedom of being young still. I plan to live my youth to the fullest making stupid decisions along the way...

With all that said, I need to start packing and running some errands.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Summer Nights

So I sit here in my room, another night of all my friends ditching out because of the need to start their work day so early. Do I regret not getting a 9-5 job so I can be just like them? Have no life during the weekdays and spend my weekends simply re-cooperating just to start the process all over? Or am I glad I have a night job that doesn't require me pulling myself out of bed early every morning and starting the day off cranky? I'd have to say I have mixed feelings. Although, with me, what is new? I can never say I'm just happy, or just sad. Ever since I was 14 I've had so many feelings. (Haha, family joke.) Anyways, it's sad I don't have a single friend that could take off one day to spend shopping with me or chill at the beach. Maybe it's just me. People making excuses so they don't have to spend time with me. Hm, in that case, watching re-runs and getting fat by continuously cooking food all day will have to suffice.

I have to say this summer has been a real changing point in my life thus far. The realization that high school was such a short period of so many memories that will never come again. I can't say I miss the foolishness or the childish characters we were, but the carefree-ness of being a bit more risky or willing to stay out late even if we had to be up super early the next day. I definitely miss the days of being supported by our parents and not having jobs, so we were all free all the time. I know it's stupid to miss things or bask in the past, but it's my blog and that's how I've been feeling lately. I work with the cards I'm dealt. I try to schedule around work and find times to see people or plan events, but it seems so tough to even try sometimes. Enough of that. I just needed to vent enough that hopefully someone might read this and realize we're still young and have time to be foolish a bit longer.

On to other news. I haven't really talked much about this on my side, but the issue of my brother being in Pakistan I think about almost every day. To answer your first question, no he's not in the military, he is in Pakistan purely by choice. He had planned and trained for a very long time to take time after completing his masters for a trip overseas. He is what I would call an avid backpacker, climber, camper, hiker, runner. So he planned to take this summer to go climb a mountain more comparative to Everest than anything we could relate to in the States. Therefore, he is on a trek to climb Broad Peak. Broad Peak is the 12th tallest mountain in the world standing at 8,051 meters (aka 26,414 ft.) He is with about 12 other people in hopes of summiting and according to what Isaiah (my brother) has said, almost all of the people he is with have climbed Mt. Everest. So anyways, as excited as I am for my brother to be accomplishing such an outrageous challenge, I still worry and think about him a lot. If you want to read more, I would check out his blog which I have been updating while he is away. Click here for access.

On that note I will say goodnight.

One more thing-
I never know what to talk about on here so if you have suggestions or want to hear me talk about more "happy" things, let me know. I would gladly update you on things in my life I haven't been talking about.

Thursday, June 11, 2009


iPhone software update comes out June 17th!! That is next Wednesday!!

So, yes, I have an iPhone and it might possibly be my most prized possession. Although I carry it everywhere it is not very well protected for being my most prized possession.

Besides being uber excited for the new update, not much else is new. Every day I think about the same 3 things:
1) When I will be working next- I work at a fancy resort as a waitress about 5 days a week and so far enjoy it quite a bit.
2) I wonder what my brother is doing in Pakistan at the moment. Right now I'm sure he's sleeping, but since I love traveling as well, I wonder how the culture is, how he is getting along with people, if he's safe, etc.
3) Lastly, I constantly wonder about the weather. Is it going to rain today? Will it be nice enough to not have to wear long sleeves? Will I ever get to go to the beach this summer? Should I even call this summer because it sure feels like Fall?

Besides work, I've spent most of my summer days wandering around the house looking for my cat and trying to have her entertain me, cleaning the house to the best of my ability, or finding errands to run just to stay busy. These are the days I wish I had a hobby. Like I could go out into my garage and build something or go running or that I had a boat I could go waste time on, or money I could spend going shopping. I usually just paint and repaint my nails or find food that won't make me TOO fat or watch re-runs of the same episodes day after day...

So with all this free time I seem to have, why don't I do something more productive? I mean I could read a book, or excersise, or build a purse rack I've been meaning to, so why not? That's a good question. I feel like even with the free time I have, I hate starting something and not finishing. Like I could go for a run, but I'm supposed to meet my boyfriend in an hour and getting ready for the run, going for a run, and then showering would take me longer than an hour. Same with building something, I wouldn't want to start building it because I'd get half done and then have to make dinner or something and it would lay half done for a few months.

Well, I'm glad I got to write some of my thoughts down, because I think I'm going to make use of my time a bit better now, or at least think I should be doing something more productive and know I have something better to do.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Meet Berea

Just to answer those basic questions people often ask of new acquaintances, I thought I would give you a little background of me, Berea Janzen.

I just finished my freshman year at Milwaukee School of Engineering (AKA: MSOE) and am enrolled in the Industrial Engineering department. I'm one of the very few people that think I know what I want to be at this early stage of my career, and so far, there's nothing else I would have rather choosen.

Although I did most of my maturing here in Wisconsin, I did most of my growing up in a much warmer climate, Kansas. And to back-track some more, I was born in Ohio and then lived in Missouri and Oklahoma. Throughout all of these places, I've been able to experience small hick towns, big cities, towns that see snow for about a month, and now experience winter 10 months of the year. So, what do I prefer? Or where has been my favorite place to live? Well, this question isn't as easy as most people think because for me, I find the best in everything. In Kansas, I loved knowing everyone and being able to walk around town at midnight and not have a single worry and of course, I loved the weather. But here in Wisconsin I love how laid back everything seems to be and I also like knowing so many people and the relative closeness of everything and playing in the snow for a few months. Both of these places I grew up in had downfalls as well. In Kansas, the closest Walmart or McDonalds was at least 20 miles away and in Wisconsin it is now June and we have yet to see 70 degree days for more than 2 days in a row.

Moving on, I also said I travel a lot, and for the average person, I still believe I do. I have eaten lobster in Maine, been to the crown of the Statue of Liberty, been on the top floor of the World Trade Center, visited Gettysburg, experienced the humidity of Florida, milked a cow in Oklahoma, built a church in Mexico, seen the Grand Canyon, walked the Las Vegas strip, swam in the ocean at Laguna Beach, seen Mt. Rushmore, driven through the flats of Kansas, and been on the highest point in the US, Mt. Elbert. I've been to the White House and Niagara Falls, camped in Canada...etc. Haha. Does that tell you enough of where I've been and what I've done? If you want to know how rocky mountain oysters taste or what kind of emotions you get when you're on the tallest mountain in America, I could tell you that too. Or how I really feel about "summer hoodies".

Well, I think that gives you enough to think about until next time.

Carpe Diem!